A Hashashin's Lament

Why will they not acknowledge me? I never imagined those who witnessed how desperately I struggled to become a pilgrim would turn away so easily. My memories are fading... how much longer must I endure this waiting? It feels utterly hopeless. The only way to see my family again is to become a pilgrim and leave this place. Yet now I stand at a dead end. Only a few memory fragments remain to me. Before they vanish completely, I must see my family once more. There is no time left, and yet no one seems to understand that.